Jay Schauer Problem-Solution Essay When students do not get work done, teachers yell at them. But what if it is not their fault? Almost always there are not enough laptops, and then there are kids running around for twenty minutes looking for one, not getting work done. That is a recipe for problems. We need more laptops to stop this.
One cause of this problem is everybody wants a laptop, but there aren't enough to fulfill the demand. Then during recess some teachers don't let us use them, further limiting the supply of the laptops. Another cause, but not necessarily a bad one, is now teachers are using laptops a lot more often. More laptops would solve this.
This problem causes some serious issues. Just the other day I had to rush through the rough draft of this essay because I had to hunt down a laptop. Some kids cannot finish their projects because there are not enough laptops. Because of this, students were having problems finishing their Spanish assignments. Also, some classes need all of the laptops at the same time. Some 8th graders came in on day and asked, "Can we borrow some laptops." We said no, because we needed all of them. Then teachers' plans are messed up because their plans depended on having the laptops.
Some causes of this problem can be fixed, though. One solution is, again, to get more laptops. If we had more laptops, there wouldn’t be so many issues. Kids would not have to be looking for one. And if students aren't searching for a laptop, they're getting work done. We could also sell the old laptops and get newer ones because the old ones have so many technical problems (one that I used had to be plugged in all the time otherwise it turned off). If we did this, I think all students would be much more successful. Another solution could be we all get Ipads, because those are less expensive than new laptops.
If we had more laptops, people would not need to wander around the school to find one. The students would be getting more work done. And the teachers' plans would not be messed up. Getting more laptops would solve our problems. That would be perfect.
Ideas 5; Organization 3 Missing statement of problem at end of introduction and beginning of conclusion; Word choice 5; Voice 4; Try adding figures of speech to your writing. Fluency 5; Conventions 4 Write out numbers under 100; check third paragraph; Do not use contractions. Total = 26 =B+
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Jay Schauer
Problem-Solution Essay
When students do not get work done, teachers yell at them. But what if it is not their fault? Almost always there are not enough laptops, and then there are kids running around for twenty minutes looking for one, not getting work done. That is a recipe for problems. We need more laptops to stop this.
One cause of this problem is everybody wants a laptop, but there aren't enough to fulfill the demand. Then during recess some teachers don't let us use them, further limiting the supply of the laptops. Another cause, but not necessarily a bad one, is now teachers are using laptops a lot more often. More laptops would solve this.
This problem causes some serious issues. Just the other day I had to rush through the rough draft of this essay because I had to hunt down a laptop. Some kids cannot finish their projects because there are not enough laptops. Because of this, students were having problems finishing their Spanish assignments. Also, some classes need all of the laptops at the same time. Some 8th graders came in on day and asked, "Can we borrow some laptops." We said no, because we needed all of them. Then teachers' plans are messed up because their plans depended on having the laptops.
Some causes of this problem can be fixed, though. One solution is, again, to get more laptops. If we had more laptops, there wouldn’t be so many issues. Kids would not have to be looking for one. And if students aren't searching for a laptop, they're getting work done. We could also sell the old laptops and get newer ones because the old ones have so many technical problems (one that I used had to be plugged in all the time otherwise it turned off). If we did this, I think all students would be much more successful. Another solution could be we all get Ipads, because those are less expensive than new laptops.
If we had more laptops, people would not need to wander around the school to find one. The students would be getting more work done. And the teachers' plans would not be messed up. Getting more laptops would solve our problems. That would be perfect.
Ideas 5; Organization 3 Missing statement of problem at end of introduction and beginning of conclusion; Word choice 5; Voice 4; Try adding figures of speech to your writing. Fluency 5; Conventions 4 Write out numbers under 100; check third paragraph; Do not use contractions. Total = 26 =B+